I call you friends because there is a connection created by you, the reader, and me when you read the words I put out there in the world. A beautiful connection that gives me relief when I need it most. Some days, I feel an urge to write. I believe it is because I have no other means of expressing and releasing my inner most hidden thoughts and fears. We all have fears, some more hidden than others, but in our hearts they can be heavier to handle on our own. Today is one of those days.
There have been many unique and special circumstances in my life during these past couple of years. Yes, it has been incredibly wonderful with heights higher that I ever thought possible, but with tremendous difficulties that have brought me to my knees. In these I can see the duality of life.
“If we never experience the chill of a dark winter, it is very unlikely that we will ever cherish the warmth of a bright summer’s day. Nothing stimulates our appetite for the simple joys of life more than the starvation caused by sadness or desperation. In order to complete our amazing life journey successfully, it is vital that we turn each and every dark tear into a pearl of wisdom, and find the blessing in every curse.”
– Anthon St. Maarten
How unfair life seems at times. During the moments where we are at our weakest and without patience, it is very easy to let go of what we want. To give in to the fear and despair. In doing so, the thoughts that come to my mind are full of uncertainty and disbelief that my decisions are right. So how do I go on from there?
The only thing to do is keep going. This is in fact my very best attempt at my life’s circumstances. And I believe that I need to accept where I am and who I am. The latter being different from the former. Who I am is based on my values, principles and beliefs. Where I am is based on decisions and gambles I have made.
It is not easy though, it never is.
So here I am right now. Trying to make it even when I feel like I am drowning.
From my heart,